I AM AFRIAD TO DIE
Jason Saylor, a man in his early forties, was dying of liver failure. Jason was terrified of dying. The first thing I noticed when I entered his room was the look of deep anxiety in his face as he lay in his bed.
“I do not feel very good”, Jason said. “I cannot eat well. Yes, I would like my mother to see me. At one time I did not believe in God. I would like a minister to come and visit me. I feel I am being punished.” So I responded, “A minister will come to see you. As for your illness, God is not punishing you. Your recent life style brought this illness of hepatitis and liver failure on you. I don’t believe God operates that way.” Jason was an alcoholic.
On my next visit the following week, Jason still had a great deal of anxiety. “Yes, my mother came to visit me. I told her everything about the crimes I committed. Recently, I have been praying very often to God. I do not want to die. My mother is also afraid I may die.” “Jason”, I said. “I also am afraid of dying. Talk to God, same as you and I are talking now. Tell Him you are afraid of dying and see if you can find some courage to face this difficulty.” Soon after, Jason got very emotional. He started crying. He did not want me to leave his room. “I don’t want to die alone”, he said. Finally he reached out his arms and wanted a comforting hug.
The following week, Jason told me,”I am very sick. I am concerned of my abdominal pains. Now, I pray to God very often. When I pray, I ask God for His forgiveness. I used to drink a lot. I abused too many women. I remember I used to stalk these women, looking whether they left their home’s front door unlocked, etc. Now I am tormented what I have done wrong.”
The week before Jason died, he started talking about the spiritual encounters he just had. This probably could have been just his hallucinations. To Jason, they seemed very real happenings. “My grandmother came to visit me here. We had a long conversation. My grandfather was with her but he said nothing. He just looked on to us during this visit.” Both his grandparents have been deceased a long time.
A couple of days later, Jason died. His mother and two sisters came to his bedside shortly before he died. It seems like he had made his peace with his family before then. He was ready to let go. However, no conversations took place during his last hours. Jason was already comatose.
Jason Saylor, a man in his early forties, was dying of liver failure. Jason was terrified of dying. The first thing I noticed when I entered his room was the look of deep anxiety in his face as he lay in his bed.
“I do not feel very good”, Jason said. “I cannot eat well. Yes, I would like my mother to see me. At one time I did not believe in God. I would like a minister to come and visit me. I feel I am being punished.” So I responded, “A minister will come to see you. As for your illness, God is not punishing you. Your recent life style brought this illness of hepatitis and liver failure on you. I don’t believe God operates that way.” Jason was an alcoholic.
On my next visit the following week, Jason still had a great deal of anxiety. “Yes, my mother came to visit me. I told her everything about the crimes I committed. Recently, I have been praying very often to God. I do not want to die. My mother is also afraid I may die.” “Jason”, I said. “I also am afraid of dying. Talk to God, same as you and I are talking now. Tell Him you are afraid of dying and see if you can find some courage to face this difficulty.” Soon after, Jason got very emotional. He started crying. He did not want me to leave his room. “I don’t want to die alone”, he said. Finally he reached out his arms and wanted a comforting hug.
The following week, Jason told me,”I am very sick. I am concerned of my abdominal pains. Now, I pray to God very often. When I pray, I ask God for His forgiveness. I used to drink a lot. I abused too many women. I remember I used to stalk these women, looking whether they left their home’s front door unlocked, etc. Now I am tormented what I have done wrong.”
The week before Jason died, he started talking about the spiritual encounters he just had. This probably could have been just his hallucinations. To Jason, they seemed very real happenings. “My grandmother came to visit me here. We had a long conversation. My grandfather was with her but he said nothing. He just looked on to us during this visit.” Both his grandparents have been deceased a long time.
A couple of days later, Jason died. His mother and two sisters came to his bedside shortly before he died. It seems like he had made his peace with his family before then. He was ready to let go. However, no conversations took place during his last hours. Jason was already comatose.
posted by Antonio at 8:38 AM
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